Archives for straight from the inbox category

what i’ve learned

Posted on Jan 15, 2010 under inspirational, my thoughts with infos, quotes, straight from the inbox | No Comment

I’ve been sleeping very late again. House is back and so is my very late sleeping habit. I’ve learned that the best under eye cream could do magic on my eye bags but sleeping early and getting enough sleep hours are still the best.

Anyhow, here’s more of the things that i’ve learned. From my email.

“I’ve learned that no matter what happens, or how bad it seems today, life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow.”

“I’ve learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way he/she handles these three things: a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights.”

“I’ve learned that regardless of your relationship with your parents, you’ll miss them when they’re gone from your life.”

“I’ve learned that making a “living” is not the same thing as “making a life.”

“I’ve learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance.”

“I’ve learned that you shouldn’t go through life with a catcher’s mitt on both hands; you need to be able to throw some things back.”

“I’ve learned that whenever I decide something with an open heart, I usually make the right decision.”

“I’ve learned that even when I have pains, I don’t have to be one.”

“I’ve learned that every day you should reach out and touch someone.
People love a warm hug, or just a friendly pat on the back.”

“I’ve learned that I still have a lot to learn.”

“I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”

birth month

Posted on Nov 18, 2009 under blahs, straight from the inbox | No Comment

Got an email about birth month characteristics. Here’s what’s being said about July.

Fun to be with
i’d like to believe that i am

Secretive
not so much

Difficult to fathom and to be understood
maybe to some? hehe!

Quiet unless excited or tensed
true

Takes pride in oneself Has reputation
hmnnn middle of the road

Easily consoled
partly

Honest
i hope so

Concerned about people’s feelings
i am!

Tactful
trying my best to be all the time

Friendly
contrary to popular belief that i’m a snob, i am friendly!

Approachable
looks can be deceiving but believe me, i’m approachable

Emotional
rarely

Temperamental and unpredictable
some people say that i’m predictable

Moody and easily hurt
yes i can be moody but not easily hurt

Witty and sparkly
maybe?

Not revengeful
true

Forgiving but never forgets
true

Dislikes nonsensical and unnecessary things
true

Guides others physically and mentally
maybe when it comes to work stuff

Sensitive and forms impressions carefully
middle of the road

Caring and loving
i think i am, lol!

Treats others equally
true

Strong sense of sympathy
very much!

Wary and sharp
i guess not so much

Judges people through observations
i don’t rely on observations alone

Hardworking
i am but a procrastinator at times, how odd?

No difficulties in studying
i would have graduated with Summa Cum Laude honors but i did not, so not true! :D

Loves to be alone
sometimes

Always broods about the past and the old friends
how can you not talk about your old friends?

Likes to be quiet
most of the time

Homely person
true but i love to travel

Waits for friends
why not?

Never looks for friends
why not?

Not aggressive unless provoked
true

Prone to having stomach and dieting problems
sooooo true!

Loves to be loved
who doesn’t?

Easily hurt but takes long to recover
not really

How about you all Cancerians out there? Share my sentiments?

new doc in small town

Posted on Oct 26, 2009 under jokes, straight from the inbox | No Comment

A young doctor had moved out to a small community to replace a doctor who was retiring.

The older doctor suggested that the young one accompany him on his rounds, so the community could become used to a new doctor.

At the first house a woman complains, “I’ve been a little sick to my stomach.”

The older doctor says, “Well, you’ve probably been overdoing the fresh fruit. Why not cut back on the amount you’ve been eating and see if that does the trick?”

As they left, the younger man said, “You didn’t even examine that woman. How’d you come to the diagnosis so quickly?”

“I didn’t’ have to. You noticed I dropped my stethoscope on the floor in there? When I bent over to pick it up, I noticed a
half-dozen banana peels in the trash. That was what probably was making her sick.”

“Huh,” the younger doctor said. “Pretty clever, I think I’ll try that at the next house.”

Arriving at the next house, they spent several minutes talking with a younger woman.. She complained that she just didn’t
have the energy she once did and said, “I’m feeling terribly run down lately.”

“You’ve probably been doing too much work for the church,” the younger doctor told her. “Perhaps you should cut back a bit and see if that helps.”

As they left, the elder doctor said, “I know that woman well, your diagnosis is almost certainly correct, but how did you arrive at it?” “Well, just like you did at the last house, I
dropped my stethoscope and when I bent down to retrieve it, I noticed the preacher under the bed.”

the bagpiper

Posted on Oct 13, 2009 under jokes, straight from the inbox | No Comment

It’s still a boring Tuesday out here… here’s a joke i got from my inbox some days ago.

***
As a bagpiper, I was asked by a funeral director to play at a graveside service for a homeless man who had no family or friends. The funeral was to be held at a cemetery in the remote countryside and this man would be the first to be laid to rest there.

As I was not familiar with the backwoods area, I became lost and being a typical man, did not stop for directions. I finally arrived an hour late. I saw the backhoe and the crew who were eating lunch but the hearse was nowhere in sight.

I apologized to the workers for my tardiness and stepped to the side of the open grave where I saw the vault lid already in place.

I assured the workers I would not hold them up for long but this was the proper thing to do. The workers gathered around, still eating their lunch. I played out my heart and soul.

As I played the workers began to weep. I played and I played like I’d never played before, from Going Home and The Lord is My Shepherd to Flowers of the Forest. I closed the lengthy session with Amazing Grace and walked to my car.

As I was opening the door and taking off my coat, I overheard one of the workers saying to another, Sweet Jeezuz, Mary ‘n Joseph, I have never seen nothin’ like that before and I’ve been putting in septic tanks for twenty years.
***

pink is a verb too!

Posted on Oct 05, 2009 under straight from the inbox, trivia | 2 Comments

Got this short info from my inbox that a colleague forwarded to me a couple of days ago.

PINK

Meaning
1 a : to perforate in an ornamental pattern *b : to cut a saw-toothed edge on
2 a : pierce, stab b : to wound by irony, criticism, or ridicule

Example Sentence
“The sleek curtain requires no sewing; we pinked the edges to add a bit of detail.” (Jennie Voorhees, Martha Stewart Living, April 2002)

Hmnn now this sounds interesting. Pink afterall is not just a color.

the 3 sons

Posted on Sep 29, 2009 under jokes, straight from the inbox | No Comment

Three sons left home, went out on their own and prospered. Getting back together, they discussed the gifts that they were able to give to their elderly mother. The first said, “I built a big house for our mother.”

The second said, “I sent her a Mercedes with a driver.”

The third smiled and said, “I’ve got you both beat. You know how Mom enjoys the Bible and you know she can’t see very well. I sent her a brown parrot that can recite the entire Bible. It took 20 monks in a monastery 12 years to teach him. I had to pledge to contribute $100,000 a year for 10 years, but it was worth it. Mom just has to name the chapter and verse and the parrot will recite it.”

Soon thereafter, Mom sent out her letters of thanks: She wrote the first son, “Milton, the house you built is so huge I live in only one room, but I have to clean the whole house.” She wrote the second son, “Marvin, I am too old to travel I stay home all the time, so I never use the Mercedes. And the driver is so rude!” She wrote the third son, “Dearest Melvin, you were the only son to have the good sense to know what your mother likes. The chicken
was delicious.”

Lift That Spirit Up

Posted on Sep 23, 2009 under poems, straight from the inbox | No Comment

Say it when you wanna be heard
Say it aloud, speak it out
Break some rules if it keeps you out of the blue
No one’s gonna listen til you say it.

Scream if you must
Laugh it out, laugh it loud
Lift your spirit up
Strike out, strike through.

Never stop, never give up
Hop and jump as high as you want
Try and fail, it’s ok than to fail to try at all
To dream is the first step to a higher ground.

Dance with all the joy and feel the beat
Sing those pains out and find relief
Experience is always there to keep
They are treasures that nourish the soul.

Stretch your dreams out and soar
Live free as the wind and explore
Go to the depths and say with much pride
I’ve reached to the heights and I’m happy.

pecans in the cemetery

Posted on Sep 22, 2009 under jokes, straight from the inbox | No Comment

On the outskirts of a small town, there was a big, old pecan tree just inside the cemetery fence. One day, two boys filled up a bucketful of nuts and sat down by the tree, out of sight, and began dividing the nuts.

‘One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me’ said one boy.. Several dropped and rolled down toward the fence.

Another boy came riding along the road on his bicycle. As he passed, he thought he heard voices from inside the cemetery. He slowed down to investigate. Sure enough, he heard, ‘One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me..’

He just knew what it was.. He jumped back on his bike and rode off. Just around the bend he met an old man with a cane, hobbling along.

‘Come here quick,’ said the boy, ‘you won’t believe what I heard! Satan and the Lord are down at the cemetery dividing up the souls.’

The man said, ‘Beat it kid, can’t you see it’s hard for me to walk.’ When the boy insisted though, the man hobbled slowly to the cemetery.

Standing by the fence they heard , ‘One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me.’

The old man whispered, ‘Boy, you’ve been tellin’ me the truth. Let’s see if we can see the Lord..’

Shaking with fear, they peered through the fence, yet were still unable to see anything.. The old man and the boy gripped the wrought iron bars of the fence tighter and tighter as they tried to get a glimpse of the Lord.

At last they heard, ‘One for you, one for me. That’s all… Now let’s go get those nuts by the fence and we’ll be done.’

They say the old man made it back to town a full 5 minutes ahead of the kid on the bike.

think otherwise

Posted on Aug 26, 2009 under inspirational, straight from the inbox | No Comment

Should you have a bad day at work; think of the man who has been out of work for years.

Should you despair over a relationship gone bad; think of the person who has never known what it’s like to love and be loved in return.
 
Should you grieve the passing of another weekend; think of the woman in dire straits, working twelve hours a day, seven days a week to feed her children.
 
Should your car break down, leaving you miles away from assistance; think of the paraplegic who would love the opportunity to take that walk.
 
Should you notice a new gray hair in the mirror; think of the cancer patient in chemo who wishes she had hair to examine.
 
Should you find yourself at a loss and pondering what is life all about, asking what is my purpose? Be thankful. There are those who didn’t live long enough to get the opportunity.
 
Should you find yourself the victim of other people’s bitterness, ignorance, smallness or insecurities; remember, things could be worse. You could be one of them!

joke time

Posted on Jul 16, 2009 under jokes, straight from the inbox | No Comment

JACK (age 3) was watching his Mom breast-feeding his new baby sister. After a while he asked: ‘Mom why have you got two? Is one for chocolate and one for regular milk?’

MELANIE (age 5) asked her Granny how old she was. Granny replied she was so old she didn’t remember any more. Melanie said, ‘If you don’t remember you must look in the back of your panties.. Mine say five to six.’

STEVEN (age 3) hugged and kissed his Mom good night. ‘I love you so much that when you die I’m going to bury you outside my bedroom window.’

BRITTANY (age 4) had an ear ache and wanted a pain killer. She tried in vain to take the lid off the bottle. Seeing her frustration, her Mom explained it was a child-proof cap and she’d have to open it for her. Eyes wide with wonder, the little girl asked: ‘How does it know it’s me?’

SUSAN (age 4) was drinking juice when she got the hiccups. ‘Please don’t give me this juice again,’ she said, ‘It makes my teeth cough.’

DJ (age 4) stepped onto the bathroom scale and asked: ‘How much do I cost?’

MARC (age 4) was engrossed in a young couple that were hugging and kissing in a restaurant. Without taking his eyes off them, he asked his dad: ‘Why is he whispering in her mouth?’

CLINTON (age 5) was in his bedroom looking worried when his Mom asked what was troubling him, he replied, ‘I don’t know what’ll happen with this bed when I get married. How will my wife fit in it?’

JAMES (age 4) was listening to a Bible story. His dad read : ‘The man named Lot was warned to take his wife and flee out of the city but his wife looked back and was turned to salt.’ Concerned, James asked: ‘What happened to the flea?’

TAMMY (age 4) was with her mother when they met an elderly, rather wrinkled woman her Mom knew.. Tammy looked at her for a while and then asked, ‘Why doesn’t your skin fit your face?’

The Sermon I think this Mom will never forget….this particular Sunday sermon…’Dear Lord,’ the minister began, with arms extended toward heaven and a rapturous look on his upturned face.. ‘Without you, we are but dust…’ He would have continued but at that moment my very obedient daughter who was listening leaned over to me and asked quite audibly in her shrill little four year old girl voice, ‘Mom, what is butt dust?’